A Smile, a Chuckle

Something to bring a smile to your face, I hope, Bush, as Iraq continues to spiral toward civil war and your Republicans rebel;

Viagra Dream

I find myself at this gathering,

a weekend of free love, perhaps,

standing in line with many other

couples,none of whom I know.

I am with a woman of great beauty,

who is not--I blush to say--my wife;

and I realize suddenly that this woman

may have expectations that I am unable,

in a state of high anticipatory nerves,

to adequately fulfill. It may be

that I need, well, pharmaceutical

assistance. In view of which,

I excuse myself momentarily

to fetch a handful of those

little blue pills from my wash bag

in the bathroom. When I open up

the bottle, though, it spills

its rattling contents to the floor.

I am amazed. I had not thought

to have so many, hundreds of them,

scattered on the carpet. I stoop

to pick them up, but they have now

broken up for no apparent reason

into small pieces, and the dog

comes dashing up to grab a share.

Fearful of what a small dog

might look like on Viagra,

I fend him off, scrabbling around

in the attempt to gather up

the pieces. But now the carpet

has transmuted into a fine dust

and the pills disintegrate

before my eyes into white powder,

impossible to hold between my fingers.

Meantime, in this desperate situation,

I seem to have forgotten all about

the beautiful woman waiting for me.

It was, I tell myself in consolation,

meant to happen. At least my wife

will be spared unsettling news.

I'm off this morning to staff one of those men's weekends we have spoken about, Bush. Wish you could join me. It's a great experience. See you Monday.